What? Ruined my life??? That may be an overstatement – but allow me to explain:
If I were a sane person, my current expression would probably look something like this:
Wow!!! I am so excited!!!
However, those who know me well will vouch for my sanity being somewhat questionable. Therefore, my true current expression looks like this:
WHAT DID I DO TO MY LIFE?!?!?!?!?
Note: I am trying to impersonate the look of a Sam Kinison scream. For those who don’t know, Sam Kinison was a comedian known for his intense, harsh, vulgar and politically incorrect style of humor. Warning!!! If you are easily offended by ANY of that, DO NOT watch the video I have linked in the next sentence. For those that are not offended, see this video (3 min) to fully appreciate the reference. Remember – You have been warned!
Why is that my true expression? Because I just got one of these:
Brand-spanking-new Samsung Galaxy S4
My family has got to be loving this. For years, they have tried to convince me of the necessity of owning a “smartphone.” They’ll say things like, “c’mon, Kelly, you need to get with the times, man!” In Sept 2013, the family was together at my sister’s house. We came upon the subject of smartphones, and so I posed the question – “So, why do I need a smartphone?” Everyone proceeded to demonstrate their particular smartphone, showing various “apps” they’d installed, and some really cool features of the smartphones’ cameras. I continued to maintain that I simply don’t need a smartphone. My brother was getting desperate – searching his phone for some feature or app that would break me… Something that would cause me to give in. Our good friend Ryan finally told Chris – “Dude, you are just wasting your time. Kelly is so dug in on this, there’s nothing you can say or do that will convince him.”
So why the reluctance? I mean, I admit that these machines are incredibly useful – only an idiot would deny their usefulness. But again, I simply did not need one. I could already make phone calls and send text messages. (Thank goodness for texting – I’d practically never hear from my family otherwise) I could already take great photos with my dedicated camera. I could already take killer full High Def video with my dedicated video camera. I could already use any desired Internet service on my trusty PC or netbook.
And also, I hate the word “smartphone” – it is a word whose letters have clever marketing oozing all over the place. Get this, people: IT IS A COMPUTER, plain and simple!!! It takes input, performs processing, and produces output. End of story. But there probably wouldn’t be one billion units shipped if they were called “computerphones.” So, yay to the marketeers!
Oh yeah, I also hate the word “app.” You know what they are? They are APPLICATIONS, folks! Is “app” supposed to sound cool or something? Well, it doesn’t. It makes it seem as if using the word “application” just takes too much effort. It also stinks of some marketing group concluding, “Hey, you know – that “application” word is just too much of a mouth full! Let’s just start calling them “apps.” It sounds so snappy!”
So, after being dug in like a tick on not getting a smartphone, what the hell happened which would cause me to all-the-sudden purchase one of these infernal devices? It is rather simple really – I decided to hike the A.T. next year. What? Why would hiking the A.T. be responsible for my purchase of a smartphone? Well – its like this: The success of my hike will partly depend upon the total weight I will carry.
Holy crap! 4 pounds for all this stuff!!!
Holy Crap! 4 ounces for this device. Wow!!!
See, I plan on having communication, taking pictures, taking videos and updating my blog – all on the trail. That means I would need my phone, my camera, my video camera and my netbook. That all adds up to a good amount of weight better spent on things like food. So after doing some research, I came across these cool devices called “smartphones.” It turns out these little do-hickeys will make phone calls, take pictures and video and connect to the internet from the trail – for a lot less weight. So, I went ahead and bought one.
I’m fully expecting to be bombarded with “Haha!!! You finally gave in!” or “There ya go – get with the program!” type of remarks. That’s all cool, and I actually look forward to it! However, I shall state for the record that “holding-out” was totally legit – I waited until I had an actual, practical, need for a smartphone. (If only I could be practical about other matters in life! LOL) And so now, my family will have to find some other presently-useless item with which to pester me about “having to have.” I can hardly wait! 🙂
Here – let me try and look excited about owning a smartphone. How did I do?
Me, accepting it as a good thing
Not too good, eh? Anyway – now that I have one, I am certain it will work its way into every aspect of my life. Great. Hell, I may even stop using my computer. If only it could generate some toilet paper – that would save some more weight on the trail. At any rate, at least I have replaced 4 pounds of gear with 4 ounces of gear. 🙂 Woohoo!!!
I knew you would succumb to the power eventually. It really is too good not to have a smartphone! I love the quote you put it from Ryan! Liking the blog man, it is totally legit!
Haha – that reminds me of the well known Darth Vader phrase – “It is useless to resist!” That night in the garage was awesome, and Ryan just knows me way too well. That quote really does apply to me – I am the “hold out” type. But at least it is honest – show me the practical use, and I’ll get it! btw – speaking of “holding out” – you’ll have to ask Ryan about “lappers” this weekend. “How the mighty have fallen…”
Ah Luke….it is useless to resist. Hey, I love my Samsung and if you need help just come on down to the “basement” for a lesson!!
Christine
Nice Vader reference, Christine. Yeah, I’m liking the S4 just fine so far!
With your admitted lack of experience with what the rest of the modern world considers essential technology crippling your aboriginal self, I hope you will forgive me for taking the liberty of giving you some advise.
Your blog rejected my advise. Take two!
However much battery power you think that thing will consume, multiply it by a factor of four. This is particularly true if you’re going to be in a signal poor area. My advice would be to leave it off during the day, and only use it to update your blog and make limited phone calls. While the phone can take photos and video of quality challenging most everyday use dedicated cameras, leaving it on to use it for that purpose will require daily recharging. Turning it on to take a picture then turning it off is going to be pretty time consuming, especially if you’re going to take a picture of anything that might not want to wait for your phone to turn on. You’ll be able to buy yourself a day or two by leaving it in airplane mode, but you’ll still be draining power all that time. Bear in mind that anything that pushes a button (moving a lot with it in a pocket is notorious for this) will turn on the display, which is the largest battery hog on the device.
I recommend a small point and shoot camera. We have a Kodak EasyShare C195. You can get one for $43.50 on Amazon, or a similar one for around that price. It features 14 megapixels, takes 2 AA batteries which last a pretty long time, and takes great pictures and video. I just weighed it, and with batteries, lanyard and memory card it is 6.4 oz. For the weight, I think it would be well worth it to be able to leave the cell phone off except for when you really need it.
6.4 oz is nearly half a pound. Ouch. My upcoming shakedown trip in May will tell the tale.
As the previous writer noted take two. Two is one and one is none if you have a problem. Redundancy is the key to survival. And by the way–once you have a smartphone, the damage is done. You can never go back. Trust me I know.
Hi Susan! You know where I wish I could employee redundancy? An extra knee, ankle, foot and leg! 🙂
But for the phone – I will bring some sort of backup power. I will also be passing towns every few days, so charging will be possible. I’m not totally ruling out a separate camera – it will depend on my final pack weight, which is TBD!
I don’t know if you’ve considered protection for your phone yet. If you haven’t, or haven’t decided yet, I have a recommendation. (Let me know if you want me to stop giving you these.). The Griffin Survivor case. I have one for my iPad, and for my iPhone. The Galaxy S4 version costs $50.00, but I’d recommend it even if you were only taking it to work. It’s rated higher than military standards for mobile device protection, states it will protect against drops of up to six feet, (I can vouch for that with my cell phone, it took the six foot plunge from the top of my work locker to a concrete floor with no damage or scratching) and is able to withstand up to 200mm/h of rain. (7.87 inches/hour.). I’ve tested that as well, texting on my phone during a downpour. No issues. It will add weight, of course, but for what it provides, I think it’s well worth it. One accidental drop or a soaked pocket in the rain, and your very expensive pocket computer turns into a very expensive pocket paperweight. I know you’re trying to reduce weight as much as possible, and this will add 5.29 oz to your cell phone, but it’s still quite a bit lower than the four pounds you started this post with. :). There are different cases out there, of course, and I’m sure most of them weight less, but I have no experience with them.
Look at me. You’ve gotten me all hyper about looking up gear. I’m jealous, and wish I could go. 🙂
I definitely want better protection than the silicone enclosure which was bundled with the computerphone. The Griffon Survivor case is a good benchmark. Thanks! If you can’t take the 6-8 months of to thru, maybe you can join me for a section hike in VA. The A.T. passes pretty close to your neck of the woods.
Nice all i would really say about that is to bring an extra battery with you. using a computerphone to its fullest abilities typically drains the battery very quickly. other than that yes you wont be using your Pc nearly as much and now you can randomly google things like the rest of us!!!!
I look forward to it! And yeah, that battery thing. An extra battery may be in the cards, but there is also a thing known as a rechargeable battery re-charger. When they are fully charged, they can re-charge a phone 2 to 3 times. So, I’ll be looking into those as well. But it would be nice to have a backup battery – but then the issue would arise: how to keep that charged? At any rate, on the A.T., I will never be more than 3 to 5 days from a town (1 day if emergency arises) so I’m thinking charging will not be an issue. But we shall find out in May when I take my first shakedown trip!
Waahhh! You have not ruined your life. I am glad you finally got one! And yours is newer than mine! 🙁
Bwwwhahahaha!!! Oh btw – this reply came from my computer phone!